Retribution X go dating!
by Anything but ordinary3
Summary: Retribution lunge into the world of dating with hilarious (and tragic) consequences! *WARNING* contains rape!
1. Preparations & Explainations

**Disclaimer: **Nothing but Mel, Ash, Kat and Ev belong to me.

I would like to say a huge thanks to Oracles Maiden who wrote all of the Mel sections for this fanfiction!! Long may our reign continue!!!

I would also like to thank everyone who's reviewed me, you don't know how much it helps!! 

Okay you don't really need to read any of the other Retribution X stories but it sure does help for this story in particular to read the previous one. Enjoy!! *Warning* this story contains non-consensual sex (though it ain't graphic!) 

**Retribution X go dating**

"With who exactly?" Jubilee asked sitting up suddenly and hitting her head on the tap of the bath

"I don't know if you remember (because I hardly do) that evening in the Sushi/Karaoke bar well I gave some guy called Kevin my number and he well rang me last night and I was a bit…."

"Pissed?" Jubilee provided

"Tipsy and well I didn't say no so he's going to ring me back next week after he's back of Holiday and arrange a time. Should I tell him that I've already got a boyfriend?"

"But you haven't!" She paused thinking "in a weeks time it'll be Valentines Day, how romantic a valentines date!"

"Yeah but he doesn't know that" referring to the fact he doesn't know that I don't have a boyfriend

"Don't be such a wimp you never go out with guys it'll do you good! You're going if I have to drag you there myself!!"

"But how do I know he's not a) an idiot b) a lunatic c) a nymphomaniac or d) a bore?"

"Well I'll tell you what me and the girls will go to the same place and check things are ok then we'll meet in the toilet and if you want us to stay on, rescue you or leave you alone we will"

I smiled a little happier "Thanks Jubes"

**Later that Morning**

"Urghh… do you think the Professor will let us borrow his cleaners for the day?" Ev asked holding up the discarded piece of mistletoe.

"I don't know go ask him" I said tossing some painkillers down my neck

At that moment Kat came bouncing into the room "We need a theme song!" She announced

"Huh?" I looked at her annoyed by her perkiness when she should have a hangover

"Bobby told me that every group of super Heroes need a theme song, I mean look at Spiderman!"

"Bobby eh?" I said cocking an eyebrow

"Well I just thought if you have any requests for a theme song just tell me, I'll be scouting around!"

"Actually I do have a request!" I piped up

"Aha I thought so and what is it?"

"That it not be Gloria bloody Gaynor!" I said

Kat dug in her pockets with a scowl and produced a notepad and promptly scrubbed out the song from what I assumed was her list, I got up and peered over shoulder.

"By the way I will refuse to go into battle if we have the Y.M.C.A!"

"Oh!" Kat said crestfallen

"And 'In The Navy' that's got to go!"

"Oh I've got no songs left on my list now!"

**An hour later.******

"How come Ashley's got a date and I haven't" Kat wailed tears pouring down her face 

"I didn't know you've got a date?" Wolverine said as he looked in the fridge

"Don't sound so surprised!" I said over Kats wail

"Aren't we good enough for you anymore?" Kat sobbed

"Come Kat _we _can't have the same kind of relationship as we can with men" I said gently teeth grinding

"Why can't we?"

"You know the birds and the bee's…"

"Don't change the subject" Kat said angrily

"Your turn Wolverine!"

"What?!" he hit his head on the top of the fridge as his head shot up.

"You explain to her, I'm sure you know more than I do" I said sitting down this was going to be fun.

"Well...um…there comes a stage in everyone's life when…er holdin' hands just ain't enough..." he said scratching his head.

It took all the self-control I possessed not to burst out laughing

"Why does there?" Kat asked innocently drying her eyes

**10 minutes later**

"…and then mummy bunny gives birth to all the little baby bunnies" He shot me a glare when I started to giggle "…Of course mummy bunny more often then not eats her babies…"

"WHAT?! NO!!" Kat started crying again "All that effort for nothing and those poor baby bunnies"

"It's okay Kat Wolverine was only joking" I said in a desperate bid to stop her crying, god I hate it when people cry.

Kat stopped crying and sniffed "But what have bunnies got to do with Ashley dating?" 

"Umm…why don't you ask Cyclops" Wolverine said

**An hour later**

"I've got diagrams" Kat said proudly as she walked through the door

"Diaphrams?" Christ she was a bit young for one of them

"Look!" she said holding her diagrams up for people to see

"Oh diagrams!" I said relieved

"Hank drew them for me!" She boasted

"Hank? I thought you went to see Cyclops!"

"Yeah well he went red and started mumbling saying something about pole's going up shafts, and I told him that I wasn't there to talk about miners. So he told me to go and see Hank. He told me how babies are made but he still didn't tell me why you're going on a date!"

**Mels****Room**** (or the room with a jubilee shaped hole) "Got it, Got it The dude just ate a baby…" **

I sang along to the radio, only just out of key as I painted the newly filled in hole.

_"The dude just ate a baby"_ Ahhh, Kat was right, changing the words was therapeutic. 

I stood in my bedroom amongst the debris from the night before- open cans, streamers, paper plates with various congealing things on them. Oh well.

"The dude just ate a baby" I sang again, jumping and twisting and using the paintbrush as a microphone. The chorus finished and I started to paint again as I twisted my hips and contorted my body in the only way one could to Aerosmith. Hell, no one was in sight and I only looked a tiny bit crazier than Kat. 

"Vat vas that?" Kurt asked from behind me. Turned so quickly that I completely forgot about the paintbrush at chest height. Still a white stripe across his uniform… didn't suit him at all. 

"HI" I smiled overenthusiastically. I could only remember flashes of the night before, I was quite sure there had been karaoke, I was certain there had been Vodka, and I seemed to remember something about drool- and seeing as I and Kurt gravitated towards each other at parties I was guessing that all three had somehow been linked to the elf.

He was obviously as embarrassed as me, coz he copied my smile completely.

"I vanted to return this." He brought his hand sheepishly out from behind him. On the end of one of his fingers looking like the corpse of a dead shiatsu was my platinum blonde sandy wig. I hadn't even realised I had lost it!

"Ok!" I replied my cheeks turning an even brighter scarlet than before, he nodded enthusiastically as he dropped it into my paint-covered hands. 

"Thanks" I added quickly, feeling like a prat with no alcohol in my system.

"I'll let you get back to your um…"

"Yeah… um sorry… you know about the stripe." I pointed uneasily to the mark I'd made on his uniform.

"No need to be." He turned and hurried to the door.

'Dumb mel, Dumb Dumb mel, Should have said something witty or seductive but no you said "Sorry about the stripe". WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!!! Knuckle head!'

I banged my forehead against the wall for my stupidity, Kat did it repeatedly and it never seemed to hurt her much… Just the wall.

However I forgot I had been blessed with the gift of brain cells. 

"Ouch!" I massaged my head in anger, "After I spent all that time fixing you! Damn wall I'll fix you good!" I almost did throw myself at the wall but before I could fulfil my promise…

"Um Melody?" ooohhhhh I hoped the elf hadn't heard me screaming at the wall. 

"Yep Kurt?" I wrung my hands in front of me, god why did my legs turn to jelly at the sound of his name; I always looked a geek in front of him. 

"I…uh…" he looked about as nervous as I did, Could he remember any of last night? Well I doubted it, the amount of shots he had. But what if he did!?! Ohh what embarrassing situation had my good friend alcohol got me into now?

"I vas vondering…" he looked down at the floor and mumbeled something in my general direction. My hearing was good, but not THAT good.

"Excuse me?"

He turned and I think he kicked my teddy out of frustration. 

Through nervously gritted teeth he again asked "Vill you go out vith me?" His eyes pleaded with me. 

I'm sure my own eyes popped out and rolled round on the floor for a second, because I couldn't answer.

"Haggern-ahhh-fingle…" I squeaked, thought I'm sure it was meant to be a coherent sentence. I held my hand to my mount in shock and he stared at me like a crazy person.

"Vat vas that?"

I opened my mouth for another attempt but my brain refused to comply, So still clutching my face I nodded quickly.

He smiled a nervous smile then whispered "Valentines day, my sweet." Before clumsily taking my free hand and kissing it. I just stood like a moron and smiled behind my other hand. Then he Bampfed out of my room. 

Now I couldn't breath… 

"HELP!" I screamed at the top of my voice. No one came 

'Damn Retribution X, damn you all to hell!' 

"HELP!" I screamed again, all the colour draining from my face. Then a head popped round the door. 

"You ok Mel?" Ev smiled at me. 

"Hyperventalating. Get… Me… Paper… bag!"

Half and hour later 

"Ok ok mel girl take deep cleansing breaths. Its not that bigger deal."

"Not that bigger deal!" I was hyperventilating into a paper bag, it was that bigger deal. "This is Kurt we are talking about here!" I resumed my fevered panting. 

Jubes however had stopped rubbing my back… "Kurt? This panic attack is about Kurt?"

"Mel's got a date with the blue furry one." 

"So… let me get this clear. I have been rubbing her back, telling her everything's going to be alright… and everything is better than alright?"

"It's perfect." I said with a dopey smile before feeling sick again. 

"That's it I'm out of here." Jubes left with an unceremonious crash. Me and Eve just looked after her before I bolted for my bathroom again.

"Its just a date mel" Ev's called after me "Don't get so worked up. Hell if he asked you to a date in your vest and pants it must all be good."

Damn, that's why I was so embarrassed.


	2. Getting ready

_Disclaimer and thanks as seen in the first chapter_

**Retribution X's Kitchen- Babysitting Kat**

We sat around the kitchen table trying to keep Kat out of Pyro's way, trust me to be left holding the baby while the others get to bug the Professor. Me, Hank and ol' one eye were informing Kurt how difficult it was to explain the whole sex thing to her, while the kid sat on the floor by the fridge eating ice cream straight out of the tub with her bare hands. 'Hope she gets belly ache' I thought bitterly.

"Umm…gentleman…I'm…er…I don't know if you...er…are aware…" Kurt stuttered

"What's the bloody kid doing now?" that stutter could only mean the kid, I spun around to check on her but she was sat blinking innocently at me.

"Don't tell anyone how I live" she whispered.

I turned back to the group gathered around the table and pulled out a cigar.

"But…um…that's is to say I have…er formed…an…er…attachment to…Melody" Kurt said hesitantly

"Awwww! That's so sweet" Scott crooned eyes misting over

"Ponce!" I growled

"SHUT UP LOGAN!!" Hank reprimanded "I agree with Scott and think that it is rather sweet"

"Owww! My tonguth thtuck" Kat said with her tongue stuck to the side of the freezer I shot her a withering look "I ran out of ithe cream" she explained

After 5 minutes of tugging she was finally free "Who were you talking about?" she asked

"Ol' blue elf over there has a thing for Melody" I said as Kurt blushed

"Ohhh fuzzy boys heading for the lurve shack" she squealed

"Ummm…Boys I think we're forgetting that this…well…" Scott looked at Kat "…thing used to share a room with the object of Kurts desire."

I knew there was a reason why he was our leader other then the stuff he got up to with the Professor

"Well your gonna have to pay up in advance I wanna see my friends Mr Hagaan and Mr Daz" This kid was smarter then she looked.

"We've only got Ben and Jerry's" I said using my newly founded skills of compromise as opposed to slice and dice.

"Haagen-Dazs"

"Ben and Jerry's"

"Ben and Jerry's"

"Haagen-Dazs"

"Ha ha, I made Wolvie look thick" The kid giggled Snick "Aarggghhh! He's going to kill me!" She said cowering behind Hank

Hank stepped in "Don't kill her we can pump her for information!"

"Yer lucky kid!" I growled sliding my claws back in

"Yes pump me, pump me for all I'm worth. Leave me hollow and alone and without a date for Valentines Day like you all are! I know I can see it in your eyes…" The kid started to sniff "…or eye..." I couldn't help but smirk "…then I'll be left her alone with my only friend who doesn't have a date…"

"Scott?" I asked

"My only FRIEND and that's Mr full fat ice cream!"

"Umm… Kat that's only half fat" Hank pointed out

"See even he's not all there…"

"Just like you" I muttered she ignored me however and carried on

"I'm just going to die alone, miserable and dead!" Her eyes misted over then thought for a moment "Oh there was a question…oh well doesn't matter whatever the question the answers Malta, it always is!"

Snickt "Kurt needs help with the perfect date for Mel" I said waving my claws near her face she yelped again and dove for cover by Hank.

She looked out under his arm "Well ask Cilla Black, don't ask me!"

I growled "Why? Why do we put ourselves through this? Chuck could make life a lot easier for us all and expel her?"

"According to her results in all the standard tests the kids a genius. So that rules out expelling her for being a dunce!" Hank informed a surprised room

"Yay! I'm the next Albert Square" Kat exclaimed

"I think that the person that you are refering to is infact named Albert Einstine."

"Noit was Albert Square. I saw it on a show."

"was the show called Eastenders."

"Well can't we expel her for being annoying?" I thought for a moment ignoring Hanks last remark. "How come you're a genius?" 

Kat looked up with an empty pot of ice cream on her head "Huh? Malta"

I sighed "Forget it!"

"Has anyone ever told you that you look like an ewok from star wars? She asked me

snickt

**5 minutes later**

Kurt looked at her notebook "so I should treat her mean to keep her keen right?"

"And talk about things your interested in. I kept Jean entranced when talking about my pokemon card collection. I tell you she was enthralled!" Scott added

"And for some reason I should sing to her about fireflies. Are you sure about that Kat?" Kurt asked her brows furrowed

Kat gave him the thumbs up sign as I tightened my grip around her neck

"Hank we've yet to hear your advice!" Kurt said pen poised to take notes

"Well the best advice I can give a fellow fur ball would be to ensure all fur is free of Twinkie wrappers and week old Murray mints" Hank said seriously

I let go of the kid's neck, it was no use she would never die.

"I wouldn't look up the girl's skirt until you know she likes it" I advised

"Are you speaking from personal experience there Logan?" Scott smirked

"Oh and girls love aggressiveness the meaner you are the faster they'll swoon" I added 

"Oh and do you know you don't need a shirt nowadays to get into a restaurant" Scott threw in excitedly

I pushed myself into Kurt's face "And if my videos are anything to go by Girls adore mud, wrestling and monster trucks but are just too embarrassed to say!"

"Never eat yellow snow"

"!?"

We all stopped and looked at Kat

"Yellows in this season, oh and watch out for monkey butlers they spit in your food and expect large tips" Kat said knowingly

**A week later**

"Your were right he is taking me out for Valentines Day" I told Jubilee with a sigh

"What are you moaning about? At least you've got a date!" Jubilee moaned then suddenly she shot up in her chair "Did you hear Mel and Kurt are going out on a date on Valentines Day"

"Always two paces behind huh Jubes? I heard that as soon as he asked her"

"Oh!" She said looking crestfallen

At that moment we heard Kat coming through the door with a Boom Box on her shoulder belting out what seemed to be Britney Spears

"For our theme do you think would be better 'Hit Me Baby'…."She asked before I interrupted

"But wouldn't that song kind a be asking people to beat you up?" I said looking at her exasperated "100,000 sperm…and YOU were the fastest!"

"Oh okay then that leaves this?" She skipped the C.D to 'Ooopps I did it again'

**An hour later in the kitchen**

_"Ooopps I did it again…"_

Sang Britney Spears a warning of the monstrosity that would enter the kitchen i.e. Kat.

"Why did we have to meet here again?" I shouted to Evelyn over Kats 'music'

Ev shrugged "Wolverine said we should?"

"Oh yeah!" Wolverine had instructed us to meet around the kitchen table at the end of our Danger room session but hell I wasn't going to argue.

Kat placed her Boom Box down and began an elaborate dance worthy of a gyrating hippo.

"What's all this racket?" Wolverine said glowering at the Boom Box

"It's our new theme tune!" Kat informed him diving for the volume control and cranking it up a few notches "Do you like?" She yelled

"Turn it bloody off before I do it myself!" Snickt 

"Okay" Kat started twitching at his raised voice. But she did as she was told and turned it off.

"Hoobloodyray!" I muttered

Wolverine looked uncomfortable "I've got some presents for yer"

"Yay! Prezzies" Kat squealed clapping her hands before continuing suspiciously "It's not one of your nasty videos each is it?"

Wolverine choose to ignore that "Here" he said tossing a small cardboard box at each of us    

"Goody a box!" Kat beamed

We each opened the boxes cautiously but broke into a smile when we saw shiny dog tags I held mine up. Engraved onto the smooth flat pieces of metal was written 'White Lightning mutant no 17887 Retribution X'. I didn't know what to say I'm no good at thank yous. I put the dog tags over my head and looked at them laid on my chest. Jubilee flung herself at Wolverines waist

"Thank you Wolvie you're the best!" She said as she planted a kiss on his rough cheek.

I smiled at him "Thanks" I said quietly

"Ooohhh shiny!" Kat said after finally getting into her box.

**The next day**

_"OOoooppps I did it again_

_I played with your heart.."_

Kat entered the rec room where the rest of us were watching the news coverage of a Friends of Humanity rally the X Men were attending.

Kat however was flanked by two large good looking male dancers covered in baby lotion, everyone looked at them mouth agape as they launched into an intricate dance routine.

I nudged Jubilee "It's isn't civilised to drool" 

**Valentines Day.******

I looked in the mirror critically, I looked typically Ashley I concluded whether good or bad I was unsure but hell I wasn't going to dress up for no one.

"How do I look?" Jubilee asked giving me a twirl

Jubes and Evelyn had bagged dates with the two hunky strippers that Kat had hired.

"You look like a normal human being" I said helpfully

We were all going together that is everyone except Mel who Kurt was giving a lift to and Kat who was being babysat by Wolverine. Talking of Wolverine

"Is Wolverine okay about giving us a lift?" I asked nervously

"Sure"

"You ready to go girls?" Came Evelyn's voice from the door

I sighed wondering if it was too late to back out "Yeah lets get this over and done with"

"God make it sound like your being led to your death why not!"

How will their dates turn out check out the next chapter to see!!


	3. The dates

See chapter 1 for disclaimer and thanx!

I stopped the car in the garage and got out. 'What ever happened to the little girls who had entered the institute two years ago all shy and nervous' I thought with a sigh 'and why can't it happen to Kat.' I added mentally walking in on her sat on the kitchen floor eating ice cream

Knock Knock

'God who the hell is that?' I thought angrily 'All I want to do is sit and watch sport and have a beer! Is that too much to ask?'

"Who is it?" I shouted gruffly at the door.

"Is Kat there?" Came a male voice

"You ain't Pyro are you?" I asked looking for the nearest window to bundle Kat out of

"No I'm a friend" Came the voice proudly before adding "I brought Twister"

Oh well if it'd keep the kid quiet I thought as I opened the door

**In the kitchen**

"A friend for yer kid" I said leading the iceman into the Kats domain

"Arrrgggghhh! Get it away get it away!" The kid screamed charging at Drake with the ice cream scoop

I rubbed my eyes this was gonna be a long night.

**5 Minutes later**

"Left Hand red"

"Right Hand red"

"Right foot red"

"Left foot red"

"Ooopppssie I fall over" Kat said with a giggle

"Cant you take her somewhere else to do that Drake?" I asked

"Can you drive?" the frigid one replied with a grin

**Mels****Room**** (Or anxiety central)**

I stood in front of my mirror smoothing my ice blue spangled top and trying to pull my black mini skirt a little further down my legs. I winced, it wasn't exactly the image I wanted to present (Kurt probably would have preferred a demure English lady) but it was better than the sandy curls and leggings of last time. 

I wish I hadn't promised I wouldn't use my powers on team-mates or teachers. 

There was a loud beep from outside in the driveway. As the only girl apart from Kat left I knew it was my date and so scurried down the stairs and into the main room. 

"Break his Legs Mel!!" she called, shovelling more ice cream into her mouth.

"Don't you mean break a leg?" I opened the door. The last thing I heard as it closed behind me was 

"I never believe in doing thing by half's."

What was In front of me was a shock, but not totally a bad one. A six-wheeled limo took up most of the drive, a large white and gold limo.

I smiled like an idiot as one of the doors opened. Ok so the limo was a bit of an eyesore but as long as the blue mutant inside it was the right one then. 

'Oh dear…' My eyes informed my brain. 

Standing now out of the car was, Kurt… but not MY Kurt. My Kurt would be wearing a nice black suit, his hair washed and swept back from his face; he'd be holding a bunch of roses and move aside to let me in. THIS Kurt was wearing a nice suit… if his date had been colour blind. It was fluorescent yellow, you know, the kind of suit a PIMP would wear. Oh and he looked like a pimp alright because he was wearing the pimps hat with a feather in it and instead of rose he was clutching a silver topped cane. 

He looked me up and down and licked his lips in a seductive manner. "Me like." He strung out.

I must admit I was a little taken aback. "Kurt…? Is that you?" I asked genuinely unsure.

He nodded back and indicated his 'Threads' "You like?"

My now fake smile got two sizes bigger. I didn't answer; anything I said would either be a lie of hurt his feelings. Obviously he'd gone to some effort. 

"So…" I said changing the subject, "where are we going… Ballet, Broadway…" 

He sauntered up to me, "I was thinking dinner." 

Now I smiled… But he hadn't finished…

"… And then home to my…" He looked down to his hand with a look of panic, then his expression changed back to that swarthy one of a second earlier "Digs…"

He moved closer, trying to wrap his tail round my waist. 

Now any other time that Kurt might have tried that move on me I'd have welcomed it, Hell I'd have ENCOURAGED it. God if I'd have had enough alcohol in my system I would have grabbed it and wrapped it round my own waist. Now however…

I slapped it sharply. That wasn't what I was expecting from the gentlemen. 

"Ohhh… Like it a little ruff do we." He purred, and I felt sick again, for all the wrong reasons though. 

"Haa haa" I tried to laugh it off, hoping this was some colossal joke and Remy and Kat would jump out of the bushes with a large can of shaving foam and spray me, however it was looking less likely they would with every second.

"Shall we go?" I suggested quickly, then realising I was going to have to share a back seat with this monster. 

He had obviously had the same idea… "I thought you'd never ask."

I leapt forward to the door, realising I'd have to crawl over the leather seats to get to the other side. I put my knee onto the first seat so that I could pull my other up underneath me. This move however left a certain part of my body exposed, and Kurt capitalised. He landed a sharp hit on my rump. "Owww!" I squealed out of annoyance. "Kurt will you stop that!" I moaned. As I crawled deeper and deeper into the creatures lair.

'This isn't going to be a good night' I realised.

**Outside the Jade room (Or 'Hell' As Melody called it)**

"The Jade Room? You mean our really nice first date, is going to be in the tacky sushi bar that gave my friend a possession." Now I was really cranky. If it wasn't bad enough that I'd had to fend off both his wandering hands and his wandering tail in the limo now I was going to have to avoid the vomit of overweight Japanese men on the pavement outside. 

It was rather cold though, I started to with I had gone for practicality instead of seductiveness- cause if Kurt kept up this act the only thing he'd be cuddling up to tonight would be a bag of frozen peas from where I'd decked him. 

Then I softened I must confess because when he saw me shivering he pulled out from the floor under the seat of the limo a huge fur coat. I smiled; maybe the old Kurt could emerge after all. I smiled expecting him to drape it around my shoulders and help me in. And for a second it looked like that was what he was going to do… until he twirled it around and slung it around his own.

I scowled as he sauntered towards the door leaving me behind to struggle past the piles of different coloured puke on my stiletto heals. With every step I repeated one word in my head that I would now and forever call Kurt. 

'Bastard… Bastard… Bastard…' and then just for good measure I kicked the arm of an unconscious man who was in my way. 

Kurt went through the door and stated to chat to one of the waitresses. As I stood beside the door expecting him to be a gentlemen and open it for me like he had on other occasions. How ever he just kept talking to the attractive woman in uniform and I scowled even more.  Then finally after what seemed an eternity he noticed and opened the door just enough to stick his head out.

"Aren't you coming in?" he asked before closing the door and resuming talking to the waitress. 

I reached forward and grabbed the handle pulling it with the strength accumulated from my rage. If I had been Wolvie I'd have had my claws out by now. By the time I had gotten inside and had checked my shoes for the tell-tale signs of vomit though, my 'Date' Had already moved off through the crowd, following the waitress and if I was right, checking out her behind in front of me.

He was a dead man.

**In the Jade room**

"What's that noise outside?" Kevin my date asked

"I Dunno, kids?" I said between sips of my drink

"It sounded like someone pushing them out of a car!" He said worriedly

"Shall we go check?" I asked "I could do with some fresh air anyway"

"Come on then"

This date was going better then I thought possible the guy was funny, kind and considerate as well as hot! And from the looks of things the Jubes and Ev's dates were going well to I watched them dancing with their dates cheeks rested on their shoulders as they danced to a slow song. Jubes gave me the thumbs up as I walked past her. But the least said about Mel's date the better.

We walked outside and were instantly hit by the sounds of children at play

"Your IT!!"

"Arrgghh! Keep away from me!"

I sighed trust Kat to turn up. I watched as her and Bobby played tag along the street. Kat waved when she spotted me.

"Do you know her?" Kevin asked green eyes dancing

"Never seen her before in my life must be some street urchin" I made my way back inside the Jade room.

**Inside the Jade room 45 minutes later. (Or Hell with a vengeance) **

"So I beat him up." I chewed on the end of a breadstick. For the last forty-five minutes I'd been sitting opposite him in the centre of the restaurant as we ate. 

The waitress had lead us to an 'Intimate valentines booth' which was basically a corner table decorated with crappy paper hearts and cupids but one look at the seat sent a chill down my spine- he'd be in easy reach of my legs. That wasn't going to happen. So I quietly made a suggestion to the waitress that she might move us to a more highly visible table, I didn't want him to pounce on me and be out of hearing range of any of the other of the Retribution X couples.

So in between mouthfuls of the few things on the menu that I knew that wouldn't cause possession of any kind, Kurt Fed me stories of his time in Excalibur and the X men proper- almost all of them involved him saving the day and beating up the bad guy. I knew almost all of them however were false or hadn't happened like that. Kitty had told me most of the Excalibur stories and Hank and Wolvie had told all of Retribution X all the old X men stories and they certainly didn't involve most of the ones Kurt was spinning for me. And I was getting rather annoyed.

In between these however there were tales of his many sexual exploits with various partners. More often than not he would throw in the fact that they often said he was the best they'd ever had.

It was one of these stories he was telling me now, but my eyes had glazed over at least half an hour ago. Instead I just stared down at the remains of my desert. But when I heard the phrase "Best she'd ever had" again I finally lost my temper and broke the breadstick in half pretending it was his back and promising myself that next time I entered the danger room I kick his holographic ass from wall to wall just as long as I didn't do anything now.

I stuck my hand in the air at the speed of light and yelled at the top of my voice "CHECK PLEASE!"

He smiled again seductively "You really are in a hurry to get out of here."

He didn't know how right he was. 

For the fifth time he ducked his head under the table. I wasn't sure what was so interesting, or if he was maybe trying to look up my skirt. But either way it didn't impress me. 

The waitress he had checked out every time she came to our table appeared over his shoulder brandishing our bill; she hesitated by him before he shook his head. "Not my bill darling. My lady is paying."

Every ounce of constraint I had left in my body left me. I was paying for this horrible experience. HE'D been the one who asked ME, to hell with me paying. 

I stood up, brandishing the straw that broke the camels back. 

"I'M PAYING???" I said slowly and angrily- like Wolvie did when Kat was annoying him. 

He smiled, nodding, unaware of what was about to hit him. My fist.

I looked around for a moment before seeing the perfect opportunity. A waiter passed close by our table, his tray stacked with two bowls of noodles that were steaming hot. I grabbed one and chucked it over Kurt's head. Now for the first time his face changed back to the befuddled Kurt I knew and had once thought loved. 

"Vat are you doing?" He said removing the bowl from his head as our waitress applauded me. 

"Something I should have done forty-five minutes ago." I said before grabbing the remaining bowl of noodles and chucking them strategically in the place that would cause him the most pain. He jumped up with a yelp as the boiling hot noodles came into contact with his groin. 

"vhat did I do wrong?" he yelped as he pushed them off his legs as he stood looking at me.

"Try everything." I screamed as a headed to the exit. All of Retribution X looking after me- the rest of the patrons even those slumped over the bars or engaging in brawls stopped for a second and applauded me as I passed my head held high, not looking back as Kurt yelled my name pleadingly.  

Well I lie I did turn back for a second. I watched him leap from one foot to the other as the noodles slowly crept down his legs, scorching him. A waiter was trying to calm him down as he continued to call after me, asking that I give him another chance. 

No way. I smiled at the pain he was in and when he saw me watching he begged me with his puppy dog eyes to come back. I stopped laughing. I stuck out my tongue and blew a raspberry instead- just like Kat had shown me. 

As I reached the girls bathroom and ducked inside I suddenly realised how stranded I was, unable to drive and without a car and very little money on me- after all I though my date would stump the bill. Well he'd have to now I had 'Left'. But I was well and truly stranded.

I reached into my bag, trying to search out a little spare change in the corners of my bag. I thought I'd found some when my fingertips brushed against cool, hard metal. I hauled it out from the depths only to find it wasn't. It was my dog tags. The ones Wolvie had brought all of us. The ones I hadn't wanted to wear on my date for fear of Kurt jumping to conclusions about the whole of Retribution X, that we were all Wolvies property. That's why I'd made him pick me up, so he would feel I was his for the night and not Wolvies on loan. Now holding ' Tantalus mutant no 17889 Retribution X's dog tags I wasn't so sure- after all we always found our way back to the big bad-ass. No matter how grown up I was, I would still need Wolvie.

I reached into my bag, flipped open my phone and called Retributions private line. Finally a gruff voice picked up…

"Hi Wolvie. It's Mel. It's all gone horribly wrong- could you come pick me up from the Jade room. I'd be ever so grateful." With that I put the phone down not wanting to explain. 

Not wanting to face the world or Kurt again, I huddled alone in a stall until Wolvie could come and collect me.

"Do you want to go on somewhere for some proper food?" Kevin asked as I began fidgeting as Kat walked through the door and was drawn like a homing beacon towards the karaoke.

"Only if we go to a drive through" I suggested remembering his lovely clean vintage car.

"Deal!" Kevin grinned back at me.

**In the lovely Vintage car (Drool!)******

I looked around the floor that had once been clean and now one drive through later looked like a war zone – a war zone where the bombs were MacDonald wrappers.

"I had a great time tonight" Kevin said stroking my cheek with the back of my hand; I fought back an urge to push it away.

"So did I" I said feeling incredibly stupid (I never did go for all that stupid soppy stuff).

I watched as Kevin leaned in and kissed me lightly on the lips. I looked at his green eyes slightly shocked before grinning. He leant in again to kiss me and this time I responded, hmmm…his lips were so soft.

But before I knew it he was kissing me differently, more urgently, more roughly. I tried to pull away as I felt his hand push up my skirt.

"Stop!" I said pushing at his hand

"Are you going to make me mutie?" He grinned evilly before adding "You know you want it your type always does"

How did he know I was a mutant, I wondered. However I didn't have time to think as he pushed his weight down upon me. 

I should have screamed, I should have fried him with a high voltage electric shock, I should have kicked him in the balls, I should have done anything but what I did: NOTHING. I lay paralysed by fear as Kevin raped me.  


End file.
